THE FROZEN MILE
Barge 34m spent a quiet winter in Bell Harbour, Monasterevin but I was keen to get moving back down the canal towards more familiar territory, namely, Banaher. I had applied for, and obtained, a coveted place on Liam Hannigan’s Barge Handling Course in Adverse Weather Conditions for Complete Beginners. Although I have owned the barge since 1998 I will confess to being a tad lazy about actually driving it but with each New Year brings the customary resolutions and first on my list was a determination to acquire actual barge driving experience. ( about time too, you may add) Module one of the Course consisted of “Learning to Drive a Barge in All Weather Conditions.” After all driving in good weather is, well, not very challenging so the prospect of driving in impossible weather conditions inspired me to don my wellies and rain gear and heave too.
Due to my lack of actual driving experience Mr. Hannigan felt it would be advisable if my tuition took place in January when there should be little or no traffic (apart from the odd duck or two) on the canal. Step one was to obtain the highest insurance allowable for an inexperience lady bargee driving a 60 tonne barge down the canal in adverse weather conditions. Having obtained the necessary paperwork we nominated January 8th as an auspicious day to travel and, all going according to plan, we calculated that we would arrive in Tullamore on Sunday 11th.
Wednesday arrived bright, dry and very cold but on the road travelling from Banaher to Monasterevin with essential tools and provisions Liam’s car radiator cracked. This necessitated stopping at various garages along the way to fill up with water. I suppose we should have been forewarned when we found that all the water taps in the garages were frozen. Not to be outdone Liam stopped the car at Boora Parklands, and wielding an axe with great dexterity, cracked the ice on the pond and filled up some empty lemonade bottles with water. Thus fortified the car radiator got us to Monasterevin and the start of our journey.
The plan was to turn the barge and face it in the direction of Tullamore. We gave her a good drink of diesel, fired up the engines, put her into reverse but not a budge. At first we thought the gears were faulty but soon realised that we were completely frozen in place. Three hours later we were still smashing through the ice and finally managed to reverse her out into the canal. Exhausted we called it a day and hurried home to check the weather forecast. It was not good but we reassured ourselves with the belief that surely a 60 ton barge could effortlessly push through any kind of Irish ice, after all its not exactly the North Pole.!
Thursday morning dawned crystal clear and frosty. We loaded up with extra turf and the remains of the Christmas chocolates. (chocolate keeps you warm!) and as many spare parts that we could find. When we arrived back at the barge we found that we were frozen in place again but optimistically fired up the engines and put her into gear. Not a budge. We spent the next hour painstakingly breaking the ice around the barge and managed to move her slowly inch by inch down the canal. The ducks waddled nonchalantly in front of us stopping occasionally to peck at the ice that was four inches thick in places.
The lockkeeper, Joe, had racked down water to bring the levels up for us. As 34m draws four foot six inches we need fairly high levels of water to prevent dragging the hull along the bottom. However, we had hardly gone a few yards when we realised that the prop was befouled with a plastic fertiliser bag. Liam hacked away at the offending plastic until he heard a crack. The hook tip had broken away and sank. Still we had a spare so finished freeing the prop and off we went again. Liam tried flinging the anchor overboard to crack the ice but it barely crushed the top of the ice. It took us five hours to reach Shepherds Bridge which is roughly half a mile from where we started.! At least we entertained the school children who alternatively urged us on and advised us to give up and go home. We anchored under the bridge for the night but as the anchor would not penetrate the ice we hammered it into the bank, not that there was any fear of the barge actually moving anywhere on its own.!
The following morning Liam introduced me to Module Two which is “The Barge Ice Break Dance.” This involves reversing back a few hundred feet and then surging forward to break the ice. He assured me that this was a tried and tested way to ice break and we could gain valuable time using this technique. So off we went engaged in a bizarre dance with the ice which involved reversing back a few hundred feet then into forward gear and smash the ice, grab a pole and run up to the bow to shove the ice sheets over onto the bank then run back to the rudder and quickly reverse back and so on…... It was exhilarating and much more entertaining than driving in normal weather although Liam was muttering a lot to himself after a few minutes and we hardly moved at all. Still I got a lot of practise in forward and reverse. The ice cracked but did not disintegrate and piled up on either side of the bank in huge sheets of ice. Some of the sheets were pushed under the ice in front and formed 8 inch slabs. Behind us the scattered remains slowly bonded and froze in mocking solidarity. No way back so on with the dance. As Liam grappled with the rudder I kept in touch with our friends and relatives at base camp and assured them that we could cope with the severe conditions and that the barge was moving. Photos were essential proof of our endeavours as snug beside their fires or holed up in centrally heated offices our friends and family found it hard to believe that the ice was really four inches thick on the canal and we could not smash through it. After all it’s not the North Pole! Wanna bet.! I decided that the only way to prove the ice was so thick was to abandon my post at the camera and stand on the canal. Liam took a few photos and our families were suitably impressed.
We were drawing water from the back sealed hatch to cool the engine but soon realised that the flow was not sufficient as the inlet hole was getting blocked due to the fact that we were scraping the bottom. Liam rigged up a bilge pump to sit in the water and pump the canal water into the back hatch and from there it managed to cool the engine efficiently. This lasted an hour until the huge slabs of ice smashed into the bilge pump and it sank without a trace. A frantic search for a spare bilge pump unearthed an old ancient model, which also refused to be revived, one could hardly blame it. I eventually unearthed a spare at the back of the paint cupboard, new and raring to go. (Module Two. Section 3.1.1. “Always Carry Spare Parts.”) With the new pump in place and the help of a feisty local who helped us to smash the ice at the water edge two hours later we managed to travel another 500 yards. Still, as a beginner I was determined to stay within the speed limit and was quite happy to potter along at half a mile an hour. At the end of the day we had travelled three quarters of a mile, got some interesting photos, and half the chocolates were gone (ok most of them were gone) but we had managed to burn off all of the Christmas calories smashing our way through the ice. So, all in all not a bad day and I had learned to ice dance a barge. I couldn’t wait for Module Three.
Saturday morning dawned bright with the canal still frozen solid. Macartneys Lock loomed mistily in the distance beckoning us forward. A short distance away, a vigilant farm dog waited to ambush us with barely contained excitement. An hour later he decided we were not worth waiting for and sauntered off disdainfully. His owner, alerted by the racket, came out to investigate and regaled us with stories of horses and carts taking short cuts across the canal the last time it was frozen which apparently, was roughly forty years ago.
By now Liam had devised a new move to the ice dance. This involved snaking the barge from one side of the canal to the next a bit like a fugitive dodging bullets. Apparently this drove the sheets of ice up onto the banks. That combined with the five hundred feet back and seven hundred feet forward gained us another half mile in three hours. As the ice still refused to disintegrate we were really just shoving it in front of us and burning up a lot of diesel. Still, we were moving and around midmorning we met a German woman out walking her dogs on her way to the shops. On her way back an hour later she stopped to sympathise and advise us that in Germany they get the Russians to go ahead in the frozen water with an ice breaker (Inland Waterway please note for next Winter). She also informed us that the lock was frozen and one could probably stand on the ice, which was really losing its novelty appeal at this stage. However, we soldiered on until we were in sight of the lock and called it a day and rushed home for a hot Jacuzzi, more chocolates and the weather forecast.
On Sunday the weather started to improve and we managed to get through McCartney’s lock. The journey from McCartney’s lock to Rathangan was ice free with fairly deep water and Liam took advantage of the relative calm to instruct me on Module Three which was “How to Negotiate a Barge Through a Double Lock.” It seemed simple enough.
On arriving at Rathangan lock a soft drizzle had started to fall which quickly turned into a downpour and I had to keep looking down the length of the boat as the rain impeded my vision through the window. I successfully manoeuvred the barge into the first chamber and Liam got out to close the lock gates. As the lock was filling the strong winds and gushing water slammed one of the centre gates closed and unknown to me got stuck under the barge fender. Liam shouted at me to reverse quickly. I promptly obeyed and the barge surged backwards with a loud groaning noise. Liam was gesticulating wildly from the bank and misinterpreting his hand signals I pushed the lever into forward…ooops. The lock gate screeched and crashed into the wall listing at a very peculiar angle. Liam gained control of the lever and reversed the barge but it was too late to save the lock gate that was, by now, jammed firmly on the wall and dislocated. I went downstairs to put on the kettle, phone my friends and eat the rest of the chocolates while Liam made emergency phone calls to Waterways Ireland. After Liam explained that I was only on Module Three ,(and may I add that hand signals are pretty useless in adverse weather conditions), they were very understanding and immediately send out an emergency team to assess the situation and assured us that no irreparable damage had been done (except to the box of chocolates).
On Monday a small contingent of diligent Waterways Ireland Workers arrived completed with a huge crane. It must be mentioned at this point that they were extremely courteous, efficient and charming and in between hacking away at the gate and the wall posed for lovely photos that I was able to send to my friends and family. We spend a pleasant morning learning the finer points of how to dismantle and reassemble a wall and lock gate. Liam quietly informed me that this was not usually included in Module Three but it was all educational and I had learned how to navigate under duress.
Tuesday dawned sunny and dry and after loading up with more provisions we prepared to set off again. Liam immediately spotted that there was no water coming out of the exhaust and on inspection we discovered that the impellor was worn out. No big deal and soon we had installed another (Module Four: “ Basic Engine Maintenance”) and off we went mercifully without any real incident. The prop picked up a piece of carpet but Liam donned a dry suit and climbed overboard and managed to cut it free. He said it was a bit chilly in the water but he had taken the precautions of obtaining anti pneumonia and flue injections before the journey.
Wednesday’s weather forecast warned of gale force winds and rain and within the hour we were locked in a battle of wills between the rudder and 100mph winds. Rounding a bend the wind hit us full on and drove the barge hard up onto the bank crushing the new bilge pump on impact. Liam took this opportunity to instruct me on “How to Disengage a Grounded Barge During Adverse Weather Conditions.” (Module Five) As this was a highly skilled manoeuvre he took the tiller and proceeded to reverse the back of the barge off the mud bank but soon realised that the extra water in the back hatch used for cooling the engine was weighting the back down into the mud. We had to abandon ship for the night and head off in search of a submersible pump. We informed the lock keeper that we needed more water and he obligingly racked down more water but advised that it would probably just flow over the banks as the canal was already full.
We arrived back on Thursday morning with our submersible pump and pumped the water (about 2 tonnes) out of the back hatch and this raised us sufficiently off the bottom to reverse us clear of the mud bank. However, the canal was fairly silted up and impeded progress but apart from some grating noises from the engine coupling we continued on through Lowtown (expertly manoeuvred without incident) and out onto the main Shannon Line arriving at Allenwood by evening.
Friday was uneventful and continued on without incident through Ticknevin Lock around lunchtime but we shortly ran aground again. No amount of manoeuvring could get us off this mud bank and so we phoned Waterways Ireland requesting assistance. They promptly sent out a van, which successfully pulled us off the bank, and off we went arriving at Rhode Bridge at nightfall.
Saturday 17 saw us arriving at Bord na Mona Lifting Bridge to discover that it was closed due to an electrical fault. However, the lads manning the bridge were able to manually wind it up sufficiently for us to squeeze under and continued on past Daingen, churning up a lot of mud and debris. After stopping a few times to cut plastic wrapping from the prop the severe wind gusts again succeeded in slamming us up onto the bank where the barge remained. Liam decided to go back for the car and try to pull us free.
A few hours later he arrived back with the car and after tying a rope to the back we inched forward slowly. By now the winds had eased and Liam took the opportunity to show me how old bargees had to use special techniques to “Drive a Barge Pulled by a Horse” (Module Six) but in this case we substituted a Nissan Micra. However, after a few minutes Liam shouted across at me that there were strange rattling noises coming from the engine room. He stopped the engine and disappeared leaving me to slowly reverse the car and follow the barge as it drifted backwards weaving drunkenly from one canal bank to the other. After a while he appeared with the information that the gear lever had popped out and was lying on the engine room floor. I untied the rope from the car and after tying the barge to a tree we stayed there for the night, while Liam pondered on how to reconnect the broken gear lever.
Luckily it was just a loose bolt and the following morning we were ready to move again and continued on to Ballycommon Lock whereupon the lever collapsed again. On investigation we found that two metal plates had come apart and we spent a few hours drilling the plates and bolting them together using oddments found in the engine room. The barge limped on until we reached Tullamore. The journey from Tullamore to Shannon Harbour was mainly without incident apart from when Liam popped downstairs for a few minutes leaving me alone and heading for the Swing Bridge. I noticed there was a huge object parked in front of the bridge and taking up most of the canal. I quickly engaged Module Seven Section 7.1 (Slow Down and Call for the Instructor) as I realised that the object was a huge Dredger and took up most of the canal. However, I remained calm, confident in the knowledge that I had taken out sufficient insurance to cover a collision.?? How much do these Dredgers cost anyway and who had the idea of parking one of them in front of a bridge on a main waterway? Luckily I had previously sneaked a look at Module Eight “How to take Emergency Evasive Action When Faced With an Unexpected Obstacle.” So I swerved the barge over onto the far bank, skimmed the mud edges, ducked under the rudder, swung her back again and actually managed to miss the Dredger and the swing bridge, not bad. By now Liam had cleared the steps three at a time and grabbed the tiller. Anyway, the Dredger was behind us untouched and the fender bounced us off the bridge. We moored there for the night as Liam said he didn’t feel like going any further.
With only six miles to go and Shannon Harbour within our sights Liam spirits were high, as our journey seemed to be coming to an end. Everything went well until we got to the harbour but just as we entered the 36th lock we heard a loud bang from underneath the barge and Liam announced that the propeller was now refusing to turn.
We are currently investigating this curious noise. Liam thinks that the nut has fallen off the propeller shaft and is searching for someone with diving experience and a very large magnet. However, he seems pleased that I do not want to go any further and has advised me that he will no longer be giving Barge Handling Courses in Adverse Weather Conditions for Complete Beginners.
Apologies to Waterways Ireland for inadvertently dumping three bilge pumps, a boat hook and a sharp knife.